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052 – How To Build Self Worth

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The tricky art of believing you are good enough

Growth can be hard. AF.

Facing the consequences of frustrating patterns can be daunting.

Not only that, it can feel like a giant mountain to climb. 

Where to start? The sabotage? The mess-ups? The work required to be consistent and disciplined?

How on earth we do become better when I’m still tied to a bunch of shit I’ve been spinning in for a long time?

In this work on becoming more of ourselves, in becoming better men, stronger men, more dependable men, more emotionally literate and nimble men we come across many blocks, avenues, tips, tools, techniques, strategies and seemingly magic-sounding potions.


In my experience, there is usually one thing that sits beneath all the shit we see and prevents us from even touching the strategies and tools – and that is a man’s relationship to himself.

Or, more specifically, his relationship to his self-worth; how he sees himself, and the beliefs he holds about his worth and worthiness.

If you are running a story that exists somewhere in the vicinity of “I’m not good enough” such as “I am not worthy of love and belonging” “I don’t deserve happiness and ease in life” or “I am unlovable” then this story and the little offspring that suckle at its teet will fuck your entire life.

This will be THE bed upon which all of the frustrating shit in your life lives, grows, and festers. If you want to change all the disappointing ways you show up in relationships – it’s not so much the communication techniques (although, they are extremely important), first it’s the belief you hold about yourself because that will determine how you show up in the first place.

It’s not so much the morning routines or the ice baths or meditation or cock magick, it’s how you view yourself, the level of self-respect you have, and if you believe that you are a worthwhile human. Or not.

This is THE work for most guys to get the fuck out of their own way and start to not only access their potential and be a useful human, but to be better than they were yesterday.


On this episode:

So, yeah, it’s important and tends to sit under most guys’ shit. This is why I decided today to do a full podcast episode on understanding and building self-worth.

Which, in itself is a bit of a misnomer. You don’t build it per se, it just is. 

You build other things.

In this episode I explore all of this, including such nuanced notions as: There’s a difference between the following statements and knowing that difference, is important:

  • “I am not good enough”
  • “I am not being good enough”

There is a difference in your worthiness as a person and man and how you are choosing to be. 

So, let’s explore it.


I hope and trust you’ll gain something from this episode, including – I estimate – a bunch of further questions. If so – good. Questions, when followed with curiosity, allow answers. Answers allow options.

When it comes to living a better life – options are important. Dive in. share. Rate and review – I appreciate your support in getting this in front of more men.

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